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Drama Queen

We all love a good drama

Purple violet cheesecake.

She measured the flour and mixed it with rest of the ingredients. The batter was ready, she poured the batter into the container and placed it in the preheated oven. She moved her attention to the unfinished icing. She was busy perfecting her masterpiece when a pair of arms snaked her from behind. She let out a gasp, the touch was all too familiar, she settled into the embrace. She could smell his aftershave, she smiled realizing how they had an argument the other night about his prickly beard. “I see that you have shaved it off”, she teased him. She could feel his frown against her neck, he bit her there instead. She hissed, he kissed her there, “I need my treat for this!” he frowned. “I’m making your favorite today” she replied adoring the cheeky smile that grew on his face. He was her’s, all this was their’s. “Are the customers here already?” she asked concerned. “Just the usual ones, I’ll get their orders ready”, and He disappeared into his counter.

It’s been a year since they started the cheesecake house, they started small, with no previous experience or so. It was the biggest risk that they took in their life, quitting their jobs and spending their investments on this. No one was there to support them on this, but that didn’t stop them from chasing their dream. It was their dream to start a pastry shop and settle in a place like this. They finally achieved it, after all the struggle. She smiled at their small kitchen, with just enough space for the two of them to work, everything is exactly the way she wanted it to be.

She recalled how they met each other, she was just out of a relationship, which gave her nothing but pain. She hated the concept of commitments and was not ready to try her luck again on something similar. But then he came along, with his big smile and frivolous acts. She tried to ward him off, but there was something different about him that made her want him to stay for longer. After months of persuasion she finally agreed to go out with him,and her life was never the same after that. He showed her places, showed her people and more importantly, he bought her food. She was ready to take risk again, to come out of the fortress which she made for herself, she opened herself to him. And it was the best decision she ever made. They loved each other like it was their last day on earth and before they knew it, they became inseparable. Circumstances laid distance between them, but for two hearts who were in love, it didn’t matter and even distance failed in front of them. She got the fairytale that she always wanted. “What if you grew bored of me?” she voiced her concern one day. “we’ll have to make everything interesting again” he said with his childlike smile. That was all the confirmation that she needed.

Years went by, they got married and it was yet another dream come true, they started a family together. Soon after, they had their first baby, then the second and third followed. Life became monotonous, work, kids, him, they became her universe. Her life revolved around her family and somewhere along the way they lost the spark. The spark which had brought them together in the first place. She was the first one to realize it, but it was too late. She knew he wasn’t the kind to cheat on her, but without him, his warm smile her heart grew cold. The happy home that they made for themselves became a bitter place. The lack of communication was taking a toll on them, they grew silent and eventually started to ignore each other’s presence in the house. Even though it came late, what she anticipated from the beginning was happening finally. She couldn’t take the silence anymore and she lost control one day and shouted at the top of her voice. It was the first time he had seen her lose it like that. The severity of the situation was finally sinking in. He grabbed her and pulled her into a close embrace. “we lost it! It’s all gone.” She cried into his shoulder. “Shush! Nothing is lost, you have me, I have you and we have each other”, they stayed in that warm embrace for a while. “What do we do now?” she asked raising her face to look at him face. “What we planned we will do!” he replied. There, she saw that again, the smile, that damned smile, which made her fall for him in the first place, and she knew it will all be alright again. And that’s how the idea of the cheesecake house came into existence. It was their dream to build this for themselves, it didn’t take long before they decided to quit their job. Their kids had grown enough to look after themselves, leaving their home and their busy city life they moved into the countryside. Someone once said, people are too cautious to take any risks that they eventually settle for the ordinary, but the ones who take calculated risks are the ones who get to live their dream.

She came out of her trance, and looked over to her husband, his brown eyes, his disheveled hair, and that gorgeous smile. Even at 65, he was all that she wanted and this was the dream that she had always had and now that she looks back at all the pain and suffering, it all made sense, it was worth it. He was worth it.

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Confession 1.

Have you ever wanted to speak your heart out, but never got to because you feared you would be judged. Have you ever wanted to express yourself but didn’t because people will think you are different. Have you ever wanted to just let your heart out, just let that pent-up emotions flow but never got to because you didn’t want others to think you are weak! Well here, I’m going to tell you something, I too am just like you. I couldn’t tell my secrets and worries to anyone because, for other’s I had a perfect life, perfect parents, and a perfect relationship, I was perfect. But it is a perfect lie. I have my flaws, but I don’t say that out loud because I am a coward, I am, everybody  is when their social image is in jeopardy. They don’t want that facade of a perfect social image to fall off and become a laughing-stock in front of others. Even if somebody who know me come across this blog they aren’t going to believe my life has become this shitty. You may have problems bigger than mine, maybe really serious ones, just remember that I am not here to measure the intensity of our problems, but just to let my heart out. All I want is someone who would understand me and don’t judge me!

Continue reading “Confession 1.”

Colours

The word colours bring a lot of memories into our minds. Ranging from the colourful rangolis to the colourful outfit that we wear during our festivals. For me colours bring happiness. I don’t understand why but a lot of colours around me make me happy for no reason. I like wearing a colourful and bright outfit, with contrasting coloured jewellery.

For me, colour symbolises energy, life and enthusiasm. It means that there is an inner aura and charm to everything that it surrounds and all that it expresses. As I said earlier, colour symbolises life and anything that is devoid of a colour of such sorts tend to make people gloomy, maybe that’s why Brahmins and orthodox Hindu culture suggests women wear white dresses after the death of their husband. They are forbidden to wear colourful dresses, bangles, bindis, etc. I guess it’s an injustice done to women, but that is not the question here, perhaps we shall discuss about it later sometime.

Now let us talk about the meaning of different colours. We know that white colour symbolises peace, goodness, innocence, purity and virginity, while black is a mysterious colour associated with fear and death. It also denotes strength and authority, visually it shows authority, whereas at an emotional level it means signifies depth.  Red is the colour of fire or blood, it is associated with energy, strength, power and passion, it is more of a romantic colour too. Orange is a combination of the power of red and happiness of yellow. It represents enthusiasm, fascination and creativity. Yellow the colour of sunshine is associated with joy, happiness and energy. Green is the colour of nature. It symbolises growth, harmony, freshness and fertility. Dark green also symbolises wealth. Blue is the colour of sky and ocean, hence it is associated with depth and stability, it also means trust, loyalty, intelligence, and eternal life. Purple combines the stability of blue and energy of red. Purple is a rare colour in nature and is sometimes considered artificial.

Colour means life have you ever thought of a life without colours, it would be a life without emotions.

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